Written by Ariadne Brill
One great way to encourage children to open up is to make a habit of cherishing daily conversations with your child.
Conversations build connection. When children feel connected to their parent, they are more likely to feel well and be cooperative.
When we pause and listen, we can really get to know so much about our children. Sometimes our children don’t readily open up and share about their day. It can be frustrating when all you want is to talk to your child and you are met with a frown and heavy sighs…Ever felt like you don’t know what to ask to get a child to open up?
Most parents really do want to know about their child’s thoughts, dreams and concerns.To raise resilient, happy children, It’s important to listen to our children often. Being invited into the child’s world allows us to be helpful and supportive parents.
So how to get kids talking?
The more our children feel they can talk to us about the little things, the more likely they will be to open up about the bigger issues later on.
We give our children an amazing gift by being simply present when they talk to us. When we hold judgment and listen to our children with the intent to discover, support and connect, magic happens!
Here is a list of 30 questions, some silly, some serious that encourage conversations between parents and children.
- If you wrote a book, what would you name the main character and where would he go?
- What is your favorite thing to do?
- If you could design a t-shirt, what would you draw or write on it?
- What was your favorite part of your day/school/activity…?
- What is your favorite memory about being ___ years old?
- If the story of YOU became a movie, how would the movie end?
- Do you have any jokes to tell me?
- What’s the funniest thing you saw today/this week?
- How would you describe a perfect day for you?
- If we had an airplane to take us on vacation right now, where would you want to go?
- If we could go to (insert name of favorite place) but couldn’t use a car to get there, how do you think we could get there?
- If you could have any animal in the world as a pet, where would you go to get it and what would it be?
- If you could do something just like your friend (use name of friend) what would you do?
- If you could do something like your Dad/Mom do, what would you want to be able to do?
- If you could change anything about school what would it be?
- If you could change anything about our family what would it be?
- If you could change anything in the world, what would you change and how?
- Who is your favorite tv/book/story character and what do you like about him/her?
- If you could eat lunch with (insert favorite character’s name) where would you go and what would you eat together?
- If you could wake up tomorrow with a superpower, what superpower would you want to have?
- If you could have any 3 wishes granted, what would they be?
- If all your clothes could only be one color, what color would you choose?
- If you could change the lunch menu at (school/home) what would you change?
- What is your biggest dream?
- What is your biggest worry?
- If you could change your name, would you want to and what name would you choose instead?
- What are you proudest of in your life?
- Where is your favorite place to be?
- What is something you never thought you could tell me but maybe want to tell me now?
- Is there anything you have always wanted to ask me but didn’t? Do you want to ask me now?
Does your conversation sometimes get stalled? Here are 10 more questions for kids that help keep conversations going.
- What else can you tell me about that?
- No way! Can you tell me more?
- Seriously? Then what happened?
- Interesting. Is there more I can hear about?
- How do feel about what happened?
- And this is making you think….?
- So, now what are you planning to do?
- I see. So what’s your next step?
- So, then how did you feel about that?
- I like listening to you. Can we talk more another time?
Peace & Be Well,